Almost there

Being a bread-winner and financing one's studies were never really easy for a small income earner like me. So I decided to make a move. For the past five months, I have been struggling for a better financial and emotional situation. I spent much, thought much, exerted much. At sometime I got sick because of the stress it had given me.

I somehow expected  for a positive result.

But just today, I learned that I did not make it. I cried over the text messages and phone call of my loved ones saying things are still OK despite the no so good news and that better stuffs are stored for me. I am so in dismay as of this moment that I want to buy two pairs of shoes before the day ends (yes, buying shoes is my stress reliever).

Hahay.

Maybe God wants me to be where I am now because many are expecting from me, because I have positioned myself already, and because I am being trained to be a good leader in the (near) future.

It might take days, weeks, or months before I finally concede that I really did not make it and that it is, was not, and will never be for me. But I still feel fortunate because there will be no adjustments at all, just a better swaying with the music this time around.

*To all those in the networking business, excuse me, but no thanks. :)