Thursday, March 11, 2010

Pain and catharsis

After more than two years of being a Contractual Employee and struggling with the traffic, noise, pollution, and strangers, I am now going back to Bicol as a regular government employee. The informal notice came just yesterday. Sad to say, I have to leave the Head Office before the month ends.

Upon learning my application status, I felt mixed emotions, until now. I feel sad that I have to leave so soon to give way for a better employment status in the province, which gave me a catharsis.

I will miss every thing I had here in Manila -- officemates, housemates, food, liberty, spots, noise, and speedy transactions. I even told my Bosses this is both a sad and happy event: sad because I will have to leave my long-time workplace and the bonding among us in the office; and happy in such a way that I have at last got a permanent position in the government and I would again be living with my family. But they told me, this is how life really goes -- every thing must grow.

I know things and events in the province are not anymore new to me since I was born and raised there. But because I am already used to the situation here in the Metropolis, I will again have to get used to what the provincial life has to offer, after all, this is for my growth.

Really, since yesterday, I cannot understand what my tummy wants. I still eat (a lot, haha), but I just excrete my intakes afterwards; and my whole body is aching. I understand this is the effect of mixed emotions that I have been feeling since yesterday -- sadness and excitement.

I am doing my best not to cry, but I guess my tears will just inevitably fall from my eyes on my last day in the office.

I will really miss every thing here in the Metropolis. But the career that is waiting for me in the province is what I have been waiting for and I know I will be happy with my family and working with my fellow Bicolanos.

This swallowing is bitter as leaving is really a hard thing to do. But I know the fruits I will be harvesting would be sweeter.

Thank you so much, my Department of Trade and Industry-Communications and Media Office (DTI-CMO) family. Hello, my DTI-Region 5 family.

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